>So, I ended up dropping one of my required course last semester due to a personality conflict between the instructor and myself.  As it turns out, it was a pre-req for another pre-req class and I can not start the nursing program without all of the pre-reqs and the instructor won’t allow me to take the class without having completed all of the pre-reqs for the course.  I am in the process of pleading my case, but because of the snow storm yesterday, no one was available to take my inquiry.  Hopefully, the roads will be better tomorrow and I can start hammering this thing out.  As of right now, I won’t be able to take the class which means that my acceptance into the program is in jeopardy.  I am a planner.  I like knowing what the next step is and I become very anxious if I don’t.  I am still waiting to hear from the professor via email.  She has an office, but doesn’t work from there and said the best way to reach her is via email.  Ugh!

Let you know how it turns out…

>So, the next semester starts up on the 17th.  I am basically ready to go.  I am already studying for my upcoming courses, not necessarily looking forward to all the memorization that is going to take place this semester, but I guess that’s just part of the experience.

Update on my fertility treatments:  I had an IUI done in Oct 2010 which failed and December went in thinking that I was going to have an IVF cycle.  Well, that was canceled and was switched to an IUI, which also failed.  I have got a donor already and we’ll see if that works.  If not, I’m not playing around.  A friend of mine offered to be my surrogate, if we need to go down that road.  I really hope that it doesn’t come down to it.  I really want to be pregnant.  But, the end result is still the same–I will be a mother, or that is the hope anyway!

Well, nothing more to update.

>Thanksgiving week is significant in many ways.  We have a whole week for break and I am going to my aunt’s house for the break.  I have a lot of stuff that is coming due in the next two weeks so that is the challenge that I am facing this week and next.  It will be good!  I am nervous.  This semester was short and I’m not doing as well as I hoped I would.

I miss my husband.  I am not pregnant.  The IUI didn’t work.  I don’t know if an IVF will work.  Just keep moving forward.

>So, Wednesday afternoon, I am getting my IUI procedure done.  I’m very excited, but nervous.  I hope this works.  I want a baby so much.  I pray everyday that He bless my family with more love!

My life is full, but it is incomplete.  My life is so wonderful as it is right now, but I feel like I’m missing out on something.  I have so much love to give and I already love so much!  I am so blessed with a truly outstanding support system!  I am not so strong, I just have really strong people holding me up and I never say thank you for being there…and I sort of take it for granted.  I am sorry if I haven’t said thank you enough or call enough or say I love you enough.  If I have neglected you or taken your friendship and love for granted, I beg for forgiveness and I will try harder!

>Wow!  So, Chemistry exam on Monday (moved from Friday–tomorrow), Psychology exam through the weekend (online and timed so, it’s not like I have unlimited time to peruse the questions), Anatomy & Physiology Wednesday (moved from Monday), Nutrition-Wednesday AM, Micro Lab write up due Tuesday, Autobiography paper for Psych due…so yeah… :s

>Well, today has been my first day more or less alone.  It went fairly well.  I cried over a cup of coffee this morning.  I could barely tell the gal who makes them at the Coffee Cart what it was that I wanted.  I had already started to tear up.  I don’t know why that is, exactly because that wasn’t ever something R and I ever did together.  Thank goodness she knows what I get and was able to finish the sentence.  Maybe it was the look she gave me…the “puppy-dog-eyes” if you will…

Then, I get someone knocking on my door asking if I have any yard work that needs to be done and that he would do it for cheap.  I was like, yeah, I have work for you!  He said he’d do it for $15…but the work I needed done is worth quite a bit more and I will pay him for what I think it is worth.  I am going to get his phone number and pass the word along because you have got to hand it to the man–he is recently laid off and looking for work EVERYWHERE!  The fact that he is a forward-thinking, hard working guy tells me that he won’t be unemployed for too long!  He told me that he has some bills to pay off and needs the money.  He hasn’t been late on anything yet and doesn’t plan to be!  My heart goes out to him!  If I can help him in anyway, I will!

>Okay, so I went back an re-read my posts…it would seem that I am a drama queen.  But I really am not! Nonetheless, my husband REALLY is leaving soon.  As in a couple of days, soon.  This is the weekend that my husband gets to decide most everything that is going to happen.  I don’t know what he wants to do or if there is anything in store, but no matter what it is that he wants to do, we’re gonna do it…this should be interesting…

I don’t know how the dogs are going to take it, but I know they know that something is up, especially Codi, my big baby of a Labrador…I can totally tell that he knows that something’s up…my little Cavvie…he’s mentally retarded…he doesn’t know anything…poor guy…

Well, I’ve got things to accomplish even if it is 10:15 at night…

>Well, the time is fast approaching that my husband will be leaving me.  I am not looking forward to live without my husband for a year and change.  I hate thinking about it.  I worry about everything right now.  But I’m being good.  Last time we went through deployment, I started picking fights with Rob all the time.  I haven’t been doing that this time.  I know he appreciates that!

I so don’t want to be single again.  I hate doing stuff by myself and I don’t have a war-wife with me this time.  I am truly on my own this time.  Such is the life of a military wife.  This will definitely be a journey I don’t want to go through again…

>Thinking about my Psych paper, thinking about how I came to be the way I am…I had an interesting conversation with him.  I see a mini-storm in the making.  Well, how did I learn to deal with things like this?  This storm is probably not going to be as destructive as they’ve been in the past…

I don’t even know how the best way to deal with all of that junk.  Hum…let it float around in my brain for while…maybe I’ll have an interesting insight later…

>Today’s been one of the worst days of my life.  I want today to end.  I’m going to bed now.  It can’t be worse tomorrow.